The New Year’s Resolution
I had finally gotten to the point of knowing now that I was with someone who wasn’t for me. I had made so much progress mentally and in my life in general that I knew what my next step was. I was super worried about going back into the single life again and detaching from this person but I knew it had to be done. The thing that really pushed me over the edge with it was that one day I was sitting in the lab at work towards the end of my shift, and I was complaining about how I just wanted to settle down and that my boyfriend didn’t want to and how stuck I felt (per usual). Then one guy I worked with looked at me in the middle of me complaining and just blatantly says “I want to settle down.” I really was in shock. I couldn’t believe some cute guy had just said this to me. I instantly was like ok Amber what is wrong with you. Now you legit have guys saying this to your face and here you are still keeping yourself stuck. It was a big turning point for me. I finally decided to make it a new years resolution to break up with this person and I accomplished my goal about 10 days after the 1st of the year. I know it sounds silly, but I had no choice but to force myself to do it this way otherwise I probably wouldn’t have done it.
Once I got over crying about it, I finally felt some freedom. I felt some confidence. I had just lost 20 lbs and was finally on track to being my better self. I was always keeping around positive people, working out, eating better, and talking to God. I also was doing my morning affirmations and routine. I felt confident to say that for the first time in a long time I knew that the right person would come to me in the right timing. I had finally surrendered my love life or future family life to the universe and decided to enjoy the moment for what it was.
I ended up running into that same guy that originally told me he wanted to settle down that one day. It was Valentine’s Day. He had asked me if I was having dinner with my boyfriend and I just said “I broke up with him, I am actually having dinner with one of my girlfriends tonight.” At that point I knew I had put the ball in his court if he wanted to ask me out. But I also was happy to be able to say I didn’t have an attachment to the outcome. I knew if he didn’t reach out and wasn’t the right guy that someone else would be. Within the next few weeks he reached out to me, and we went on a date!
